Sunday, 3 April 2016

Not A Fresher, But Still Wanting To Be A Fresher

So, the time has come to say goodbye to my 'fresher' title.

I've been officially stripped of it. 

Well technically I was no longer a fresher at the start of the term anyway, way back in January when the new influx of people joined the uni, but I was too in denial to accept that then. 

But now I'm more accepting, I mean 5 months of acting like a fresher can really take a toll on your physical, emotional, and mental capability to make it to lectures every day, especially when you were absolutely pie-eyed elbow deep in a garlic mayo kebab only a couple of hours prior.

So for the good of my health, and to manage to get to uni on time, I have retired my title. 

Now, I say this but whether this will actually be put in action over this new term is anyones guess. 

But let me reassure you, this doesn't mean I will not enjoy a night out or 3 per week, because believe me I may not be a fresher anymore but I will not be stripped from my human right to go out and get the drinks in. 

Guess Who's Back, Back Again

Yes Hello, Bonjourno, Konichiwa, I am back.

I haven't actually been anywhere, but regardless of this, I am back.

The real reason that I had vanished over the new year was honestly, because, when I started this blog last year it was purely because we had to.

To get extra credits for my university degree we were told to create a blog. Now, I did enjoy it yes. But I didn't enjoy it to the extreme that I imagined myself keeping it going after the term had finished when it simply didn't count for anything anymore.

So that's what I did, I essentially abandoned my blog, which looking back now was fairly stupid as I spent a long time preparing and writing the posts and wondering what people would want to read, even though barely anyone read them, if you did hello and sorry to disregard you!

But a couple of people actually told me that they had read my blog (ok, this was mainly some of my family and close friends - but they're still people, right?!) and they said they really enjoyed the sarcastic and witty tone, which I wanted to get across from the start.

So due to the high in demand thirst for me to come back*** here I am, back and ready to hop right into the saddle once again.

Watch this space.

 ***please note the sarcasm here, if you don't my previous and future blog posts will be lost entirely on you...***

Monday, 23 November 2015

Backseat Drivers

I have a car, a valid driving licence and, not to blow my own trumpet too much, I'm also a bloody good driver. 

So for people to sit in the passenger seat of MY car and throw shade at MY driving is absolutely under no circumstance regarded as acceptable, and quite frankly I'd rather open the passenger door and boot them out than listen to their opinion of my driving. 

You may be asking yourself who has gotten me so wound up? The answer; my older much more condescending and egotistic brother, who also drives like a 90 year old OAP who wouldn't dream of going 1mph over the speed limit. 

*Quick disclaimer; I love old people, I really do. But I hate their driving...*

Now, this goes beyond the standard brother - sister banter that many siblings have. The only way I could describe the relationship between us was if I was to use the words 'Civil War'. 

We constantly feud over everything and anything that could be worth, and not so worth, arguing about (9 times out of 10 though it will be about the tv remote, and who's going to be in charge of it). 

Anyway, I digress. Going back on subject of backseat driving, my brother only this week agreed to get in my car and allow me to drive him after a year of passing my test. His simple excuse for not doing so before was "I value my life". The absolute cheek of it! 

But something must have won him round in the end, the jojoba and shea butter scented car freshener perhaps being just too tempting to resist. But boy, was that the worst car journey I have ever been on...

"Slow down Nicol", "you're too close to the car in front Nicol", "you're not checking your mirrors enough Nicol". 

I swear to everything holy that if my mum was not in the car with us at the time he would've found himself stranded on the side on the A34 en route to Oxford attempting to flag down another poor victim to listen to his agonising questioning and running criticism.

Tuesday, 10 November 2015

Resting Bitch Face

So, its been brought to my attention by various friends (and total strangers) that I have an almighty resting bitch face, RBF for short.

For those who have never heard of the expression, the urban dictionary sums it up pretty well:

Being graced with the inconvenience of RBF is not something you'll ever be able to escape. Here's a few issues I get on the regular for having the expression:

  • It's hard to make a good overall impression towards new people, as everyone thinks you'll be a judgemental and stuck up bitch (but hang on, aren't they being the judgemental ones..?)
  • You get told that you resemble Lucy Watson from Made In Chelsea on the daily (for people who live under a rock, she is pictured below).

  • This also makes you seem very unapproachable.
  • The positives; you'll never lose at poker or get wrinkles. 

So there it is, the not-so-secret secret is out there. For anyone else cursed by RBF, I wish you well and may you be calm in your many years of being told to "lighten up".

Thursday, 5 November 2015

The 'Freshers' Fifteen'

I would like to think that I've always had a (semi) petite body frame, and without the risk of sounding too confident, I am was pleased with my body proportions.

I would like to think that this has upheld throughout the 5 weeks of being at university. Sadly, I know this isn't true.

First of all, freshers week, where there is no way in hell you'll be able to keep up with the healthy lifestyle you might have been accustomed to before university. The amount of alcohol that you'll drink in one night alone will be enough calories to take you right through until the next week, and that's before you stop off at the greasiest kebab van on your stumble home.

(Also, it's worth remembering that freshers week does not last a week, it can last many weeks...)

So, let's do some easy calculations; if you're going out 3 or 4 times a week for 2 weeks and buying a kebab each time, you will be eating 6-8 kebabs in 2 weeks. Kebabs are estimated to have around 1,000 calories, so that is 6-8,000 calories for one 'snack' in those 2 weeks (gross!!)

My advice; start signing up to the university gym now and do some high intensity cardio if you want to avoid the dreaded 'freshers' fifteen'.

*Word of warning; do not go down my route of signing up to pilates in the attempt to convince yourself that you're doing exercise. News flash: you're not.*

Monday, 2 November 2015

The Short Life

Before I arrived at university I never quite realised how short I actually was. 

The average height of an 18 year old girl is 5ft - 5ft 5 inches, and being 5ft 4 inches I am fully in-between this category of normality. 

But, despite this I'm still classed as 'short'. I'm not talking just a couple of centimetres shorter than everyone else, I'm meaning a good 5 inches shorter and for a 5ft 4 person this can be very intimidating and also very annoying (stop using me as an armrest!)

Now, my theory is that I'm just surrounding myself with people who are freakishly tall and secretly they should be the ones who feel intimidated by the little more petite people running around weaving in and out of them in large crowds. 

But, despite the annoyances of being shorter than the majority of the universities population, there are some definite advantages to being a short girl, and here are a few of them. 

  • You will never experience the perils of not having enough leg room on trains, planes, buses and cars.
  • You will never have to worry about being taller than your date, if you're into that kind of thing. 
  • You will look forever young, being 'cute sized' and everything.
  • No one will ever be able to describe you without the word 'cute' being included somewhere. 
  • You can have a permanent laziness pass - can't reach the biscuit jar on the top shelf? no problem, ask someone else to get it.
  • Heels - no high heels have ever been too 'high'.
  • Power walking to keep up with taller friends will help you shed some excess weight.
  • In photos you're usually told to stand or kneel in front of the taller superior people, but the joke is really on them - no one in the front row is ever forgotten!
  • Standing upright on the top floor of double decker buses will never be an issue for you (taller friends, you may not have such luck...)
  • And finally, you are able to join in with finger painting and sit around wearing princess costumes because children think you are one of them.

Monday, 26 October 2015

Uni Life: Week 4

It's coming to the end of the fourth week at university. To say these 4 weeks have gone quickly would be an understatement.

It seemed like just yesterday I was packing up my room and preparing for the 10 minute journey (yes, you heard that right) to Buckingham university.

Living so local to the university prompts a lot of questions about why I'm living in halls and not commuting from home. The simple answer: I needed to get a breather. I think every 18 year old reaches a point where they feel it's time to go solo and become more independent away from the clutches of their parents, I know I did.

*Quick disclaimer: becoming independent still means I can take my washing home once a week, or maybe twice...and maybe pop back for the odd Sunday roast*

So, over these past 4 weeks I've collected together photos and videos of the people who have added to my university experience, including my favourite ones below:

First night of uni - as you can see, it was a messy one!

The second night in Oxford was equally as messy - but luckily this picture was taken before any morals were lost...

I was fortunate to meet four big personalities in the first week of freshers

*Cue the obligatory jumping shadow photo*

                   One of the first pictures of us together, and one of my favourites

London drag night - a night full of laughter and silliness
below is a short video I managed to record - look how she slays!

*Obligatory pre-law ball selfie* (almost missed the bus for this one picture)